4 Ways to Escape the Destructive Victim Mentality
Did you know? Living inside the victim mentality can potentially have devastating consequences. For yourself and the people around you, especially subconsciously.
Not only will it make you feel sad, anxious, and full of anger, but you’ll probably ask yourself “Why me!?” all the time.
Usually the victim mentality is what remains after trauma. It doesn’t matter how big the trauma was.
It could be severe or, on the contrary, dismissible. The consequences however will haunt you nonetheless. Like a silent killer, slowly robbing you of life.
This is where the problem begins. Trauma can – quite rightly – be very intense, but it has no positive effect whatsoever to fall into that seductive victim role where the blame is always pointed at other people.
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What if you could be happy again?
Now the big question for you: Do you really want to be happier? Do you want to live without that heavy luggage?
If you have answered the question with a big “YES!”, Choose development from now on. The way in which you judge yourself and how you stand in life also determines how your life looks.
If you choose to be a permanent victim – as the person who is always done everything – you will not bring about any changes.
1. Choose to work on yourself
Nobody is responsible for your happiness. Not your partner, not your family, your friends. Nobody. Except you yourself.
If you’ve made a habit out of living in the victim role, choose to work on yourself by taking responsibility for your own actions and emotions.
We have our own role in almost anything that happens to us. Even when something happens as an accident, we choose how to interpret it and also how to react to the event.
Controlling your own actions, thoughts, and emotions will help you with your self-confidence too. You’ll feel more powerful, and you’ll stop relying on external validation to feel good about yourself.
As the days pass by, you’ll build up stability and inner-mechanisms that fuel your life with positive emotions no matter the circumstances.
2. Let go of the blame or guilt
It’s okay not be okay. To feel neglected, abused, and hurt. But it’s not okay to waste your life confined by those nasty feelings, blaming others for everything that’s happening to you. Blame is just as pointless as the guilt.
Instead of blaming others and thinking “me vs. them”, start focusing on your own actions and reactions instead. See yourself as an equal to other people.
Equally worthy of love and equally capable of doing good things. Accept that everyone has the right to mess up sometimes, as long as you learn from your experience and move forward in life.
3. Be thankful
Let’s do a little experiment here. If you ever become aware of using the victim mentality in a situation, make a list of at least 10 situations that would be worse than yours. Feel inspired? Go for it. Increase your list as the scenarios come to mind.
Next, make a list of at least five people – whether you know them personally or not – who seem to have a more unpleasant life compared to you.
Think again about your current situation and try to break out of the self-pity. I’m not saying that your feelings are invalid. Trust me, I only want good things for you.
But in order to move forward you need to change your perspective about life. Maybe even take it a step further and write down some of the thing you’re thankful for.
Ask yourself: what challenges and opportunities is this situation offering to you?
Because honestly, things may be unpleasant but they are never the worst. It could always get worse.
Be grateful for this moment right now. That you are where you are. Breathing. And be grateful for the opportunity to work on yourself.
Do’t be hard on yourself by the way. The victim mentality won’t go away overnight, nor will it magically turn into self-awareness.
But are you aware of the fact that the sole decision to change is already a significant step forward it itself?
Stay persistent and do your best to understand every piece of your personality, no matter how unlikeable it is!
4. Crawl out of the victim mentality with hypnosis
If you’re aiming for self-development, online hypnosis websites can be a very helpful asset. Why? Well, this form of therapy can make changes to your underlying negative beliefs and emotions, also known as your subconsciousness, easily from home!
Ever noticed that annoying little voice in your head that says stuff like “You can’t do it” or “you don’t deserve to be happy”?
Well, turns out you’re not crazy after all. That voice is directed by a legitimate part of your brain. A part that – in fact – controls 95% of your actions. Subconsciously.
Hypnotherapy focuses on this part specifically. The goal is to remove those negative emotions and beliefs about yourself and replace them with positive ones. This will inherently, and quite literally, change the way you think and how your perspective of life.
A hypnosis session also resolves the aftermath of a traumatic event. It doesn’t remove the memory though. It simply changes (or solely removes) the feelings attached and associated to the trauma.
Eliminating these negative beliefs and emotions, in combination with professional and personal attention, makes the self-development process a lot more effective.
I hope this information has been helpful to you. I wish you all the best with your own journey of self-improvement. To retrieve positivity and joy.
But above all, to love yourself again.
Questions about escaping the victim mentality?
Do you have any questions about how to break free from the destructive victim mentality?
I’m here to help. You can contact me by sending an email to [email protected]
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